About a year ago, I was going through the laundry and I came across the strangest thing. It was a black beret that had somehow made it’s way into my pile of clean clothes. It was now about the perfect size for my little dog Sadie as the wool had felted (doesn’t that word sounds naughty!) and shrunk. When Roem came home later that day I quizzically asked him, “Do you have a beret?” He burst into laughter and admitted he had found the beret on a park bench earlier that week and wanted to “surprise” me with it. I will never know what would posses him to pick up a beret off a park bench in SAN FRANCISCO and bring it home as a gift for his fiancee. Whatever the reason, anytime I feel the need to dissolve into laughter with my spouse i just intone “Do you have a beret?!” It works every time.
The secret language of couples is a topic that has always intrigued me. It turns out this habit is a sign of a close relationship and can really help bond a couple. You can read more about it here. These code phrases are developed over time and result from shared experiences and memories. I’ve noticed that we pick up a lot of our vernacular while traveling because we are spending so much time together, and a lot of it is stressful. Sometime the only way to remember I love the guy after he leaves our camera in a public restroom is to giggle about the time he dropped me on a dance floor in Costa Rica. It’s these shared experiences that bond us together and keep us sane as we live our crazy lives. There is nothing better than telling a travel story with Roem or recounting a funny memory when we are bored.
You take all these little moments and somehow they add up to a life together. Without fully realizing it, you are creating a unit and becoming a team. The insider talk and couple code creep into your vernacular and you skip the beginning to get to the middle. So the next time I heave a sigh and start to become exasperated Roem has forgotten to take out the garbage again, he can just meow to remind me of the time he held a dead rat by the tail and flung it into the bush to distract a rabid cat. Because, in the end, those are the things that matter.